time to move things around

Spent Saturday driving in traffic for nearly two hours to finally find parking then hike a mile or so to the Berkeley Kite Festival. We had never gone. I had always wanted to go. Though I think if we ever went again, we would stay at the hotel right next to the park. The kite festival was entertaining and fun. We got to watch the Japanese team try to launch a few of their kites and watched as another that was in the air took out another large kite. Those guys are working hard to tame the air. Plus their kites are scary when they come down, built with light wood and paper. I always like watching the choreographed kites that chase each other like an elite squadron.

Walking back we passed by the Takahara Sake tasting. The sake there was decent, but didn't feel anything was fabulous enough to buy a bottle. They even had a raspberry flavored sake, one of their modern mixes. But since we had gone to Hangar One and tasted their real fruit infused vodkas, you could really taste the difference. But the nice part about this place is that it does introduce alot of people to sake.

Sunday went to Kali class in the morning. My arm which I injured last month still isn't up to par but have been working around it. It was quite a workout mixing through numerous weapons: 3 sectional, staff, stick open hand. I'm not sure what it was, but the hits seemed to all hurt more today. At the end my body rebelled with a nice sharp pain between my shoulder blades. Tuhan did some onsite chiropractic moves on my neck. Thus I spent the rest of the day with really great posture because I really couldn't move otherwise. For me this is usually a sign to rearrange something in the house as I'm sensitive to environment changes. The body is telling me there's something that needs to get unstuck.

Anyway, today's energy went into unstucking the thing known as the hubby's closet. I had reorganized my own closet to better reflect what I've been wearing now. The hubby wasn't sure about me touching his closet, but then I showed him mine. We pulled a couple of boxes which I'll bring to the downstairs closet. I then refolded his clothes while he decided which shelves and drawers the clothes would go in. Later we went to Bed, Bath and Beyond and picked up some shelving and various other gadgets, like a hanger caddy, and a tie hanger.

I've been reading the book called, "The Influencer". It discusses the ways that influence works and how people are influenced and uses examples like Delancy Street and the Carter Center ridding the world of Guinea worm disease. It breaks down influence into 6 sections: Motivation and Capability on a personal, social and structural level. I might write more about this later, but certainly if you like "the Tipping Point" I would say, "the Influencer" is a good follow up.

Somewhere in my brain there is a significant and tangible relationship between the book, the closet, and the kites. I just don't have time to discuss that at this point.

Tomorrow is a wine tasting at the Ritz-Carlton. Time for bed.

opening up

Things are opening up. A couple of our organizing projects at home are really making a difference. And a few places I've been stuck with are loosening up as well. Even as the weather mixes from warm to cold to warm again, there's something about that dynamic weather energy that really gets me moving.

And while I've been getting rid of stuff I've also been bringing new usable stuff in.

One of the favorite things I bought was the Magic Ball Mop Holder. I bought two of them and they work great! I am usually skeptical of the "As Seen on TV" stuff, but this one actually does what it says it does. I put one in the office to display and store all the staffs, spears, and walking sticks and another in the closet for brooms and such. We had gathered quite a collection of sticks that we just kept leaning against the wall somewhere. They would eventually topple over whenever we closed the front door since we often leaned them against that wall.

The other "Love It" buy was the Zojirushi Electric Hot Water Dispenser. A few weeks ago I started noticing that the hubby was microwaving every hour or so. Eventually I asked him what he was doing because he wasn't heating food up. He said that he's been drinking warm water at night so he doesn't get into these dry hacking coughs. Hot water dispensers are just one of those Asian household appliances that you get after rice cooker and rice dispenser. Ok so I don't have the rice dispenser (yet). Fortunately for us, I had come across a $75 Amazon gift certificate so that cut the bill quite a bit. We got a fairly fancy one that electronically dispenses, but also has three different heat settings, auto shut off and a timer. I have to admit, it makes me drink more tea. So this has been a boon on the health side as when the hubby drinks more water, he drinks alot less soda, and an increase on the tea drinking.

The last thing we bought recently, again with the theme of new and effective was an ottoman for the living room. This 2 in 1 was great! I put one aside to put my feet up while watching television and the other we used as an end table for the sofa. I flipped the top over to get the food tray top and stored the throw blanket inside. I had been wanting an ottoman for a while, but hadn't seen anything that fit with our current decor. The faux black leather goes with just about everything and I love the extra storage. After a morning of kali seminar and an afternoon at a christening, I propped my legs up on it and I can't believe why I didn't buy one sooner. My feet are quite grateful. Plus since they are more on the sturdy and square side, they can be used as extra seating (if/when we actually have guests.

And in actuality that is the goal. The hubby has been getting massages at work since they are subsidized as one of their perks. He actually found someone who could massage him without him getting super ticklish. He came up with the idea that maybe we should have him come over for a couple of hours and do a table massage at home. This is quite odd for the hubby to say since he usually felt like our place should be in proper order before people should be let in and I usually don't care if it's people we know. But I argued his side for a change and said we should really get our place respectable looking for guests. Thus the quest to reorganize the living room because when it's done, we get to finally invite the massage guy over. I am indeed a fiend for massages. Is there really a reason to refuse a massage? Anyway, this has proved to be wonderful inspiration for getting organized.

it's a game

The hubby is into WOW, aka World of Warcraft, the online adventure game. As gamers know these kinds of games are huge time sinks, and some women find themselves "widowed" by the games. Fortunately, the hubby isn't too bad.

We talked once about how to get him to have incentive about real life adventures and we wondered if we could make these tasks into some kind of quests with rewards.

Lo and behold in the latest issue of MacWorld, I read about Chore wars where you can sign up on as a character and create a list of "adventures" (ie chores) that have applicable gold rewards, monsters and treasures to find.

We'll see how it goes. I do know that anything that lets you "keep score" is often a good thing in terms of creating habits. I'll let you know how it goes.

technotrash

We often took trips to Alameda County Computer Recycling Center to get rid of various computer and video equipment. Before they used to charge a small fee, now they have funding from the electronic recycling act so now you have no more excuses on holding onto your old computer because you don't know how to keep it from the landfill.

However, what we were left with were boxes of VHS tapes. A few were personal memories but alot of them were just tapes of shows before there was tivo. And we have boxes of old zip and floppy disks as well. What to do with that? Fortunately, there's Green Disk's Technotrash cans.

If you have 20lbs worth of stuff you can ship them the box yourself and pay a small processing fee. Or you can order one of their Technotrash cans (35lbs and 70lbs). You can toss in a whole bunch of stuff with your shipping fee already paid for. They ensure that your data will be sufficiently destroyed and what can be recycled will be recycled.

making space

The glacial body adjustments caused by my braces has now made its way to the middle of my back and the lower ribs. It's like having that stiff muscle that you just can't stretch out. Not too painful but dreadfully annoying. Yet, I am learning about the multiple muscle layers that make up the core that I remember coloring in anatomy class. If I had known it was going to be like this, I might not have gotten braces, but while I'm here I might as well make it a good thing.

As my body creates space, I've started making space in my physical surroundings which includes consolidating to a smaller storage locker, rearranging closets, and creating enough space in the bedroom floor so I can do my morning and evening yoga. I'm hoping in creating space externally, will help with my body creating space internally. And while I mostly talk of the physical layers here, there are spiritual and philosophical layers to this I don't discuss in this forum. But in the end, as bothersome as these physical things are, they represent significant changes that I hope will bring about greater things in my life. Sometimes you have to get things in order, before you can go anywhere.

In our last class, Tuhan mentioned the book, The Tipping Point. The main example of the idea is that it's the little things that can turn a neighborhood around: removing the graffiti, weeding and mowing the lawn, picking up the garbage, stopping the petty crimes. But that you have to be consistent and immediate in your reaction to these small things. But this idea works with alot of other things in our lives that we are hoping to change.

So creating space in the bedroom is the start of a personal experiment to take care of the little things in that room and see how it expands. I know the body and mind will resist, thus the aches and stiffness this past week. The clutter attracts one kind of energy, the openness attracts another for good or for bad.

whole brain or half brain

During my recent training a work, they covered the Whole Brain model. It says that the brain is a mix of 4 quadrants which they categorize by color: blue, green, red, yellow.

Blues: analytical, bottom line, technical, financial, expert in a field
Greens: organized, detailed
Reds: Interpersonal, emotional
Yellows: Dreamers, big picture, artists

You start by choosing a group of colors that you feel you are most like. I think when I did this the last time I was very yellow, though most people are a mix of 2-3 colors and often have a dominant default. When I'm relaxing, I'm very yellow. Don't really keep track of time, into aesthetics, can draw larger concept out of detail. Next I think I'd be blue, partially that the field that I'm in attracts blues. People who collect and analyze data. Next is red, people who like people and are good at socializing and being aware of people's feelings. Lastly, I only have a touch of green and often only when I commit to focus on a thing.

The different colors have ways to communicate. Reds and Blues, Greens and Yellows are diametrically opposed which means that they have the greatest difficulties communicating, yet they fulfill each other's greatest needs. Greens can be obsessively very narrow, so yellows can get them to see the big picture. While yellows don't do enough planning, greens are right there with the details.

Of the four Green is very distinctive mostly because the other colors often notice them as very detailed, but can also be seen as controlling and obsessive with their one way.

All four are really necessary and really necessary when working in a group as each dominant feature gives you something. 4% of all people in a challenging situation can think with all four parts. 12% of CEOS can do this. I guess that's a trait of being the head honcho.

I find, that if push came to shove, I often will become the missing color. Want a tightly run meeting? Sign me up! Yet at home I sorely lack a green initiative though I go through my bouts. It kind of ebbs and flows.

I also started noticing the "colors" of my family members. The hubby while quite green at work, is not very green at home and with me only with bursts of it, it can be a challenge because there are tasks that have to happen that are most suited for green thinking. My mother is definitely high on green as she needs things put in order and seeing this order comes quite easily for her, which explains our arguments about keeping my "yellow-minded" room clean. As a yellow I need to understand the big picture and why things must be done a certain way. Also because my mind likes to explore possibilities, it's difficult for me to choose a way to organize as my mind wants to wander into numerous other configurations and I just don't know which one to pick. When they say, "everything has a place" my mind asks "why is this place better than another?" At school I was quite neat, but that's because everything had a place and someone else chose that place , and sometimes there were rewards for doing so. Plus the method to organizing must "make sense" to me and not simply well because it has to be this way or this is the only way to do it. I immediately rebel against those notions because I constantly believe in options. My sister too is a green, which explains our reactions to how we travel.

I'm getting some semblance of "green" mindedness at home, but it still must "make sense" to me. Hanging clothes in color order makes sense to me. Doing 15 min a day, makes sense to me.

But just because you are dominant in one color doesn't mean you can't be the other colors. You can consciously do things to be less default. And it's good to stretch in this way as it helps you understand how people communicate based on what's important to them. Yellows want to know why. Greens want to know the details. Blues want to know the bottomline. Reds like to know how everyone is doing. So part of the reason someone stares blankly at you when you ask them something, may just be because their brain literally does not comprehend the way in which you are asking. In my adulthood, I often felt like I could never be as organized or take care of a household the way my very green minded mother did and I would feel bad that I was "failing" at it because I couldn't do it in the way she did.

It's like how a track coach once told me to run faster, but didn't give me any tools or drills to learn to run faster. As far as I knew I was running as fast as I could. I couldn't comprehend what faster meant. How do you run faster? How much faster?

By being multiple colors and trying to achieve whole brain also allows you to be more of the proper color when necessary. There are advantages and disadvantages of being each color. And understanding different ways of thinking allow you to view different approaches to the same problem.

Now that I have a bit more "why" answered, this "standard" I used to hold myself up to doesn't bother me as much anymore. I just understand it as a way of thinking, but if I focus on the goal, what are the different ways to reach that goal. In understanding this, I now integrate "green" things with a "yellow" approach. If I knew why certain things should be organized in a certain way, then it's easier for me to keep it neat.

Kermit was right about how it wasn't easy to be green, but we're all chameleons, so we don't have to stay that way.

saturday/sunday something

A friend was having a surprise birthday party. I thought it was Sunday, but it wasn't, it was on Saturday, but managed to say hello anyway. It was a bit of a comedy of errors. Silly silly me. In any case, we got Alameda's famous Tucker's supercreamed Macapuno ice cream, oh yeah!

You know, and we actually had Saturday free. We went to the Farmer's Market. Came home and napped and napped. Then I spent the evening rearranging the office and clearing it out. Then as a reward went to Kansai (which the hubby blogged about) and where I got the idea for what the Coming Full Circle II essay will be about.

I've been struggling with what this essay, a "follow-up" to the writing in the first Coming Full Circle over 12 years ago. I must have 5-6 different intros and outlines written out. Where to begin? What to say? Where am I now exactly? Then listening to the sushi chef speak about fusion cuisine, it came to me, and the message was confirmed this morning in Kali class. Actually, it's a message that has been repeating itself for some time, and I'm just now grasping it enough to bring it to paper. So what does a Japanese sushi chef have anything to do with Filipino identity? You'll just have to read the book to find out.

saturday at home

The hubby went north on his trek to find the rest of his mother's family tree. He found a relative who has now traced the family back to the 1850s. They certainly weren't a family of sharecroppers.

In the meantime, I stayed at home to do homey stuff since it feels like I haven't been home the entire week. I was thinking about going to a martial arts gathering this morning in downtown Oakland, but instead I crushed graham crackers for my strawberry cheesecake crust. I had seen a recipe for the ultimate cheesecake on the Food Network once and since then, I had been wanting to make cheesecake. I even picked up a spring form pan earlier in the week and finally opened our cuisinart mixer we received as a wedding gift.

I don't like cooking as much as I like baking. And it was a rather simple recipe. Instead of the blueberry topping, I decided to make a strawberry sauce from the berries we had picked up from the market last week. That was alot simpler than I had thought it would be and it looks like a basic recipe I could use with any berry.

It was fun finally unpacking the mixer. And I thumbed through the enclosed recipe book for the next thing to make.

While waiting for the cheesecake to cook, I rearranged a closet, folded some clothes and went through a few more boxes. I know I did alot, a part of me feels like I barely made a dent, but that may be because I wasn't touching the piles I had been avoiding. sigh. Then again, I ended up doing alot of stuff around it. OK, I'm going to have to suck it up and set the timer. In the meantime, the strawberry sauce is cooling, and I wait for the neighbors to finish drying their clothes and think about how nice it would be to live in a single family home with a garden and kitchen counter space.

Just be

I remember "Just Be" was the theme for a Filipino Queer Conference at UCLA that I attended that was organized by some friends. In the Queer community there was such torment about labels and trying to figure out who you are and how you are depending on who you're associating with. An irony really of "coming out" was an aspect of still really hiding. It's a running joke about how the acronyms in the queer community just get longer and longer. There was L & G, then B & T, then questioning, and so forth and so forth. And so they came up with the theme of "just be" to say to attendees, don't worry about who you are and aren't, just be who you are.

Well, this theme has come back into my life in the last few weeks as this has been the theme of several of Tuhan's lectures. While the 20s were about searching and looking, the 30s is more about being. In one sense, "being" is hard because then what do I have to worry about? I have to let go of all the self-consciousness of being "good enough". I have no more excuses to not do something because I'm not quite there yet. All of that goes out the window! And a part of me likes all that self-consciousness and worry and doesn't know what I'm going to do without it. But in reality, the self-consciousness and worry took up way too much time and energy, and now there's plenty of time and energy to do everything.

In the last month, I decided I wanted to have a home where I could entertain people at a moment's notice and not have to stress about needing to clean up a month in advance just to have people visit. And this meant creating space which I've been writing about over at another blog. I started with doing 15 minutes then 15 minutes, then 15 minutes. Fell off the wagon, then took a different approach where I focused 15 minutes of cleaning and organizing on a single room, like blowing up a balloon, focusing on a room allowed me to create a bigger and bigger space.

I'm not quite done, but I think I've achieved a higher baseline. At the same time, I've actually been consistent with doing the yoga in the morning and before bed, looking to expand the space in my physical body. And each step, expands my energy. I think I'm the healthiest I've ever been in my life. The back injury from a month ago was painful but I see now was part of the healing process and creating the new baseline. It'll be interesting to see what changes when I get braces.

I've started to notice things coming into our lives. Like I told the hubby that I wanted this thing, and then a day or so later this exact thing came into our lives. And I think things came into our lives before but I think they're a bit bigger now which is why we're noticing them. And we're also making things happen.

I looked back at the month of February and it was packed with things as much as every other month, but this time I didn't feel tired from all that activity thinking where did the time go, this time I looked back at the month and felt like I did the things I needed to do. I didn't feel behind or that I was missing something.

Feng shui wise all this rearranging and getting rid of stuff is about being able to focus and concentrate our time and energy better. It's about concerning yourself with the things that really matter to have the most effect on the world around you. There's a great sense of freedom in that.

For a while I had been doubting whether I can have it all and I mean all the dreams I've always wanted. And there's a growing part of me that feels like, yeah, I really can have it all and I'm going to plan to have it all. These are exciting times!

burnt plastic

We accidentally left the microwave cooking for too long and melted some tupperware. We've been trying to air out the house while we're at work, but the smell still lingers. Websites say to try to microwave baking soda in water or vinegar. Going to the store for some white vinegar which makes a nice cleaning agent for most things. I hope it works. This stuff smells worse than burnt popcorn. Fortunately, the bedroom door was closed when the incident happened so we can rest soundly without having some nasty odor infiltrate our dreams.

In other news, might try to see if I can find Mr. Priego while in London. Maybe we can chat about XML and Dreamweaver.

The back is getting better. I can last about 5-6 hours on a good 15 minute morning stretch. But today's list of meeting did me in by 4p.

Tonight, I'm emailing all of the engaged brides who stopped by our Your Exquisite Photos booth. Learning how to sell, bargain, chit chat. So, if you know anyone having a debut, getting married, or in need of updating their family portrait. Or maybe you'd like a new author photo headshot. Let us know!

I remember seeing Bino's author photo from "The Umbrella Country" and I thought he was a model. Great lighting and posing goes a long long way!

It's all part of the larger plan of doing work that's not really work. While having 9 to 5s are nice gigs, it's also nice to do things where you can set your own hours. Or to spend more time doing work that you would have done anyway or like doing, but it's bonus that someone is willing to pay you to do it. It's also nice to have some supplemental income coming in. Nice part about photography is that it's flexible enough that we could do it full time or just part time.

Alot of the photographers we met at the bridal fair were husband and wife teams. The husband usually started in it, then the wife joined him, which I may end up doing as well. Everyone has a different eye and it's fun looking for art.